Featured Guest - Fat Women of Color - #FridayFatChat

Earlier today, I was a guest for Fat Women of Color’s Friday Fat Chat.

I had such a great time speaking with Ivy Felicia about my community work, friendships, love and more!

Catch the reply below!

Elderqueer Femme Month - Let's Talk About Sex with Dr. Bianca Laureano

The next installment in the Elderqueer Femme Month programming will be coming up this Sunday at 2pm PST. I hope you’ll join us! More info below. Message @elder_queer on Instagram for link to event.

Let’s Talk About Sex: Workshop and Q & A with Dr. Bianca Laureano

Whether with a partner(s) or with yourself, sex as a queer person over 40 has its own distinctive joys and challenges. Dr. Bianca Laureano will lead us in a workshop exploring these themes which will include a writing exercise and give us takeaway worksheets that we can share or use later in other ways to explore our sexual selves during this stage in our lives. We’ll also set aside some time for questions towards the end.

Dr. Bianca Laureano is an award-wining educator, curriculum writer, facilitator, and sexologist. She is a Foundress of the Women of Color Sexual Health Network (WOCSHN), The LatiNegrxs Project, ANTE UP! Virtual Freedom Professional Development School for Justice Workers, hosts LatinoSexuality.com and is the Lead Educator for the Oscar nominated Netflix film Crip Camp (2020).

This event is FREE open to Femme and non-Femme identified Elderqueers (40+).

Giveaways sponsored by Everyone Deserves Sex Ed and Spectrum Boutique!

Elderqueer Femme Month - Queer Parenting: Beyond Conception A Femme Perspective

Hi All - I’m hosting several events for Femme Month over at Elderqueer (which I’ve recently joined as an Advisory Board Member). Elderqueer is a peer run group of queer folks over 40. It’s been so nice to be in community with queer folks my own age <3 Below you’ll find the flyer for my first event which will be a conversation on queer parenting between Dr. Carmen Rivera, Lisa LaBorde and Niki Best. Will be such a great convo for both parents and non-parents alike.

Special thanks to the folks at Everyone Deserves Sex Ed and Spectrum Boutique for their donations for our giveaways! I hope you’ll join us. Please email Elderqueer at Elderqueer@gmail.com to get on the mailing list for the zoom links! See you soon!

DYKE DAY LA X MIXOLOGY ON A MISSION FUNDRAISERDYKE DAY LA X MIXOLOGY ON A MISSION FUNDRAISER

Hey y’all! I’m curating a fundraiser to benefit Dyke Day LA and I’d love for you to come!

Click the image above and learn more! Help keep Dyke Day LA FREE and grassroots. If you’re BIPOC, use code BIPOC for a $25 discount.

Shantell Martin WAVES at Band of Vices

To be patient. To ride and then rest... and in this surrender understanding how it serves not just yourself or your work as an artist but the world around you." - Shantell Martin. 

Hey Hey! I’m back and on schedule with my one post a month intention. YAY me! Another intention I had this year was to see MORE art. Either solo or with folks, I need to feed my need for beauty, creativity and inquiry in my life. I checked out the amazing and thought provoking Shirin Neshat show I Will Greet the Sun Again at The Broad a few weeks ago and it was fantastic. The show is no longer at The Broad but if you’re in the DFW area, the show will be at the Modern Art Museum of Fort Worth from Feb 12, 2021-May 16, 2021 so make sure you make some time for that if you’re in the area during that time.

About 3 years ago, during my time as the co-facilitator of the QTPOC Open Space group at The Center in Long Beach I was introduced to Shantell Martin’s work during the Black History Month unit. Shantell Martin hails from London and her resume is long and impressive. Her art has graced varied museums and institutions as well as Time Square, 29 Rooms and even a collab with Pulitzer Prize winner (and LA’s own) Kendrick Lamar for Art Basel in 2017.

I fell in love with Shantell’s work. Her philosophy, the beauty in the impermanence, the depth and simplicity in the lines and the way her body is a vehicle for the work she offers to the world. As long as I’ve been following her work, I haven’t really heard of her showing in Los Angeles very often so imagine my GLEE when one of my favorite galleries in LA, Band of Vices (which I wrote about HERE) announced they would be showing Shantell Martin’s work at their gallery for a solo show entitled WAVES.

I loved standing outside Band of Vices and seeing the stark contrast between Shantell’s signature crisp black and white and the pavement and street signs along Adams Blvd. As soon as I walked in, I was greeted by Band of Vices owner, Terrell Tilford. We chatted a bit about our love of Shantell’s work, he handed me the show catalog and I was off to enjoy the work.

“So many things affect our ability to connect with who we are, but at any given moment one does have the ability to return to one’s self. Like waves. Learning to simply be. To ride and then rest…and in this surrender understanding how it serves not just yourself, but the world around you” -Shantell Matin

The show is composed of drawings on paper, reclaimed objects and several pieces drawn on the walls that will be painted over after the show closes. I would say this is “on brand” for Shantell as so much of her work deals with themes of impermanence and the beauty in not only living in the now but appreciating being in the now (word to Ram Dass, RIP). Being in the presence of he work was such a gift and reminder to experience life and the meditative qualities of creating and being present.

Photo courtesy of Band of Vices

During this season of Valentine’s Day and Dia del Amor y La Amistad, I’ve been meditating a lot about the role that my community and chosen family plays in my life especially as a single lady of a certain age where it seems that most of my peers are married with kids and in monogamous relationships, a stark contrast to my life as a kinky, non-monogamous femme. These meditations often have two outcomes, either feeling super empowered or honestly, a little scared and lonely (we’ll dive into that on another post) so imagine how perfect it was to see this piece on the wall

Image Courtesy of Band of Vices

Looking at this piece brought me great joy and served as a reminder of the ways community care shows up in my world. I saw the little folks on the side as little soldiers lifting up the person on the right who was in turn holding up the person on the left and immediately felt the love. Such a beautiful reminder of the power of community care in all of our lives.

I don’t want to post all my favorite pieces, because if you’re in LA, I highly recommend taking some time in the next few days to head over to Band of Vices and experiencing Shantell’s work in person (especially the temporary pieces that will be no longer after the show comes down!). The show closes this Saturday, Feb 22nd. if you’re not in LA or can’t make it you can take a look at some of the pieces HERE.

Some other shows I want to check out before the first quarter of 2020 is over are Lauren Halsley at the David Kordansky Gallery, Shizu Salamando at Oxy Arts and Betye Saar at LACMA. What’s on your art must see list? Let me know!

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Shantell Martin’s “WAVES” is currently on view at Band of Vices through February 22, 2020.

Band of Vices, 5376 W. Adams Blvd.; (323) 480-4220, bandofvices.com; Fri-Sat., noon-6 p.m.; free

Coloring Butch Lesbians at Bookshow

Last night was a perfect night in NELA.  After yoga, I headed over to BOOKSHOW for their Coloring Night.  On deck last evening was a selection of pages from Stacked Deck Press Butch Lesbians Coloring Books. These coloring books (there are two of them, broken down by decades 20's, 30's & 40's and 50's 60's & 70's). The books are jam packed with beautifully handsome butches spanning the decades.  You'll definitely want to get your hands on a copy. 

The organizers had snacks, wine, pages from the book, colored pens and created a great environment. It was lovely to see stories being exchanged and some really great inter-generational dialogue happening that was sparked by the pages/butches in the books.  Bookshow even raffled off a coloring book for one of the attendees!  I met some really great folks and got invited to one of Bookshow's many monthly events Collage & Cry! Collage & Cry is a donation based community night where you can make a collage (materials provided!) and crying is welcome.  Sounds like a great night for this emo Pisces gal.  

Check out the pics below from last night's event and if you're in LA, check out Bookshow's website and facebook page for info on all the happenings.  Support your local feminist and woman owned space! 

Lynn Ballen giving an impromptu herstory lesson to one of the attendees

Event Organizers L to R Tara Avery (Publisher),  Pamela Brooks, Lynn Ballen, Angela Brooks & Bookshow owner Jen Hitchcock (bottom).